In a horrific football accident earlier, I dove for a ball and landed on my face. Steve remarked that I could have broken my neck, but luckily I was just left with a scraped up nose and some face scratches. My face is…
ZINGER OF THE DAY Scenario: I was cleaning all the stuff out of my car. I stuck my 2 pillows over by the washing machine for my mom to wash (I hadn't washed them for as long as I can remember). She quickly scoffed at…
JUST LOOKING AT THE PICTURE OF MAD DOG 20/20 MADE ME FEEL SICK SO I DELETED IT. Last night we took a wild ride to the dark side. The African-American side to be exact. Our quest for a new and exciting alcohol to imbi…
I was looking back over the past couple years, and I've never announced New Year's Resolutions on Xanga. So, I could probably do that. Eventually. Also looking back, I feel alot better about everything than I did at t…
All was right in the universe last night as the famous triumvirate of Jones, Steve, and myself were reunited in our rightful places - Steve's bed. It is a scenario we've had many times before - always leading to a plet…
Merry Christmas to all my friends, and all my enemies can go to hell. I taught my little brother to say Butt-Head. Damn, I'm a good influence. I tried to teach him Beavis, but he kept saying Beasiv. I'll have to t…
There was no flux capacitor necessary to experience the time warp that was Jacob Gesser's party. With a cast of characters as diverse as NHS Class of '03, there are many people who have become but faint memories, and it…
Here's a short update. I touched the hand of God, aka George Deutsch, last night. It was great seeing people I haven't seen in very long and imbibing an adult beverage or 20. Today was spent scaling the globe with my l…
Holidays are a slow time for Xanga as most people have better things to do than read the stuff I rattle on about. I will stick in the Ned for a while but I hope to make a visit to Austin soon enough to hang around and b…
I'll be heading to the N in a couple of hours. Just gotta take care of a wee bit more biz-nas first. Yesterday I used my noggin and brought my TV to my beloved father's house. This will maximize my car space big tim…
I must apologize for my uncharacteristically somber post yesterday. I realize that many of my fans come around looking for a daily dose of good humor sprinkled with a unique blend of staggering brilliance that only T to…
I have been stricken with a rare fit of depression. I don't know whether it's from having to pack, or because another semester has come to an end, or perhaps I've just had a bit too much self realization lately. Or may…
King Kong pretty much pawned. It is a great bargain since you pay one flat fee and get 3 hours of movie. The scene where King Kong fights versus 3 T-Rex's is one of my favorite all-time fight scenes. Even though I hav…
Allright, well here's the definitive word. I will clean/pack in an energy drink fueled splendor tomorrow, tie up a variety of other loose ends, and then my estimated day of arrival in Nederland will be Tuesday. Fear…
There comes a time in every man's life when he must shave. This is often the most annoying of chores because it's so lame. But the good news is that I will be in Nederland, aka Utopia, aka Paradise, soon enough. S…
My TZ postulate can now be desribed as (Caffiene Pills + Energy Drinks - Sleep)(t) = Throwing up + Passing out for 10 hours in the middle of the day (where t is time) I am better now though. King Kong maybe tomor…
What I proposed as the TZ Hypothesis... Caffiene Pills + Energy Drinks = Sleep has actually ended up being... Caffiene Pills + Energy Drinks - Sleep = Splitting Headache - Will to Live but, I guess a King's gotta do…
The cold weather aggravates my bullet wounds. I think I like the cold weather, though. It sort of brings me back to my roots. I hate getting popups that tell me how to block popups. I mean, what is the deal? Here…
Pretty cool day today in sports, or as they say in Spanish, deportes. There is nary a thing I like more than watching Peyton Manning and the Colts carve up a team. The Cowboys used the luck of the pimps as they managed…
Whenever they were interviewing Vince, Reggie, and Matt back in the greenroom before the Heisman presentation, I couldn't help but think of this hilarious thing. It would have been great if when Kirk Herbstreit asked, "…
Some people ask me, "TZ, where do you get your great ideas?" Well no one really asks that but they might one day. And I might say, "Well, hot naked chick who I just had sex with like 10 times in a row, sometimes I get…
I just had the weirdest freaking moment in my entire life. When I was a child, my mom and dad took me to some store and I took my picture in a photobooth thing. I was like 4 but I remember perfectly. Anyway, they put…
25°F Feels Like 12°F This reminds me of when I worked at the secret government oil fields at the South Pole. Atleast I don't have to worry about attacks from the world's largest meat eater, the polar bear. Sure they…
What a weird, wild day. And it goes a little something like this... It was blistering cold outside and sort of rainy. But somehow every cloud that came my way had a shiney silver lining. I got to use the reversibil…
If you are a newb and/or sucker, you might not have caught the trailer to X-Men 3 yet. What are you waiting for? Check it out here: http://www.apple.com/trailers/fox/x3/ Never in my wildest dreams could Frasier (Kel…
Thanks to some curse, I am on a Macintosh at school. Everything takes about 10x as long to do. WHY GOD CAN'T THEY JUST PUT IN A RIGHT CLICK! Anyway, it took me awhile but I finally got the new Rex and the City o…
Uhh, I forgot to make a black shirt or whatever. Maybe tomorrow. Yeah probably. Maybe some new animated .gif's too. And expect a new Rex (drew it already, just need to scan). So I got that goin for me, which is ni…
Tonight can only be described as an instant classic. Our friend Taylor Guidry entered what I can only describe as the dark side. Hilarity, rants, anger, akwardness, and more hilarity ensued. He called bullshit, phil…
Texas pwnd today to get to the National Championship game. In watching just the first half of this USC game so far, I can honestly say that if Reggie Bush wins the Heisman, so be it. He is very deserving. Maybe I will…
Good news. Registration is not required in order to protect my ideas etc. I can use a "™" mark whenever I want and its legit. You just have to pay if you want a "®". Here's what it said on the official government sit…
And now for the epic continuation... It costs 375 dollars to apply for a trademark. Just don't steal my ideas in the meantime. And don't forget to purchase REX AND THE CITY merchandise! Perfect for all occasio…
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