It's the little things that make my life somewhat interesting and at the same time mildly tragic. It doesn't help that I easily get on edge and overstimulated. I'm getting better at coping as I get older, but stuff still crops up.
Like, take the other day for instance. I read
this story about this woman who swallowed a roach and then tried to get it out with a fork and ended up swallowing the fork. This is 100% true. So, of course, that got me scared about roaches. So I went to the store and bought all this roach fogger to make sure my house was immune.
Yesterday morning then I was going to setup to fog the kitchen before work so it would be dissipated by the time I got back. So, I set the fogger, run out, and head to work. Of course, doing so distracted me and put me off my normal morning routing. Then, show up at work, realize I forgot to put on a belt. Freaking catastrophe. Another man might have said "Oh well, no belt today I guess", but I'm not another man. Not having a belt would have haunted me all day, so I had to drive back to get one. Of course, this led to me having to run through my apartment whilst the roach fog was blowing full steam. My curiosity made it so I couldn't help but take a quick whiff of it while running around holding my breath. Instant nausea and headache. Morning ruined.
Here's another example of neurosis going haywire. We have these little badge holder things at work, and since I always play with mine, it ends up breaking. Around 10 months ago, I went downstairs to ask the HR lady for a new "lanyard" as they're called, and she totally stiffed me. Something about how they were waiting for a new shipment of them to arrive in November, and she only had a few left, and I should just make due with my broken one for a while. Result: my confidence is totally shattered. I was able to get a new lanyard since then, but invariably it breaks every few months, and I'm so scared of getting rejected, I can't make myself go ask for a new one when it does.
So what do I do? Being the genius I am, I don't cry, I improvise. Gorilla Glue. Long story short, my fingers end up all but caked in the stuff, so it's like I have an extra layer of skin on my fingertips and can't feel anything. I'm not sure of any antidote other than just giving it time for the skin to die off. And of course my badge ended up glued to my countertop and I had to pry it off with a fork.
Nothing against Gorilla Glue, though. I love the stuff. It effectively solved a bobblehead dilemna I had a few months ago with no problem. I should have just been more careful this time.
Things like that happen all the time that just put me off. Like this weirdo probably-mental chick seemingly chasing me via zombie-like walk through the gym parking lot, forcing me to retreat into my car and get the hell outta there as fast as possible as she stood there staring. I still don't know what she wanted, but no good could have come up with it.
Sometimes, I can't win for losing.
Comments (3)
and why are they called lanyards?its a name tag!
wonderful entry gave me a good laugh!
When I was writing this post I was reading the album cover inset thing for The Antlers album, and on it they put their song titles and then an "alternate title" thing and one of them was "Kettering (or Bedside Manner)". I was really close to choosing "Two (or I Would Have Saved Her If I Could)". Her title actually goes with her post though.