The day started off well because we had a speaker in my Plant Design class. He was okay at first, but he saved all his best material for last.
He decided to leave us with some parting blasts, under the guise of what not to say to co-workers when you get a job. Some of the stuff he told us to avoid saying include:
"All Muslims are terrorists."
"I smoke dope."
"I had an abortion when I was twelve."These are all direct quotes. And this was after he regailed us about how he was making two million dollars a year toward the end of his Chemical Engineering career. Old, bitter, rich, guys are funny.
So I was pretty happy after that episode, until I entered my Biology class.
What do I see? Some horse's ass sitting in my seat! I sit in the same seat in the front row everyday. Since all the rows of chairs are ungodly compact, I like sitting up front so I can spread all my stuff around, lounge deep in my chair, and stick my legs way out. But this court jester decided to take my favorite seat.
I was considering throwing a harpoon through his chest, but I didn't want to get blood all over me. So I just went and sat a few rows up. It sucked.
However I was able to overhear some of the morons talk in my class. My favorite moment was when someone whispered to her friend, "What does
volatile mean?"
If you don't know what simple words like volatile mean, then you deserve a harpoon through the chest. And it's not like she was some exchange student learning English for the first time. She was some standard ugly white girl who had undoubtedly been brought up through our public school system and somehow made her way into UT.
Realizing how stupid she was helped highlight how smart I was, and that put me in a good mood for the rest of the day.
On another note, I now have 6 different shampoos/conditioners in my bathroom. Yes, I'm hetero. I just like shampoos and clean hair, is that such a big deal?
Comments (1)
"Realizing how stupid she was helped highlight how smart I was, and that put me in a good mood for the rest of the day. "
Spoken like a truly honest charlatan.